Anniversaries

Our two-year wedding anniversary came and went on the 4th of July. The day itself was completely uneventful, but we enjoyed an incredible meal at Henrietta's Table in Cambridge a few days beforehand when Paul's parents babysat Buzz. Then my 29th Bastille day happened, which was spent mostly in the car but ended happily with my family in Rochester. Our six-year dating anniversary is on August 1st (hence witty blog title).

July 8th was the anniversary of my grandmother's death. It's been a difficult year without her. I especially felt cheated of the opportunity to share with her my experiences at every stage of my pregnancy. I tell Buzz about her all the time and imagine how she would react to him. It's comforting that I can live some of the moments I'll never have with her in my head; I can draw from the countless hours we spent together.

While it goes without saying that Buzz has changed my life, I've lately noticed how incredibly different this summer is than last. Whereas last year I was wishing the days away until I could get back to work in order to escape the idle grief, I can spend each day of this summer staring lazily at my baby without worrying about being productive. Being a mother will have innumerable advantages, I'm sure, but one surely must be a change in my own priorities and anxieties. Thank god. Grama would be proud.